November 27, 2013
Reflections
Tonight, I began my traditional Christmas baking. I made dough for pecan crescents and put it
in the refrigerator to chill overnight.
Of course, I forgot to buy more flour so I will run to the store in the
morning and pick it up along with the butter I also forgot.
I make five or six different kinds of cookies and several
cheesecakes every year. Occasionally, I
make a Dutch apple pie. The baking
always makes me nostalgic. The scent of
the nuts, the sugar and the vanilla brings me back to other kitchens and other
times.
There is something primal about working with dough. While I am stirring and mixing, I think of
all of the women before me, cooking for their families, and pouring love into
their cakes, cookies and pies. My mother
loved to cook. She would start before
Thanksgiving. I lost count of the number
of different kinds of cookies she made.
Every batch was lovingly placed in a metal tin that was lined with wax
paper. Each layer of cookies was
separated with more wax paper and then the tin lid was securely fastened in
place. From these tins, she would create
beautiful trays of mouthwatering treats.
Friends and family members would sit around our kitchen table for hours,
drinking coffee, talking and clearing the trays down to the crumbs.
Her mother was a true Southern cook. Everything on her table was fresh and
homemade. I remember pies setting on the
sill to cool and peach cobbler resting on the stove. My father’s mother immigrated to this country
at the turn of the century. She brought
all the Sicilian traditions with her. Besides
spaghetti, meatballs and lasagna, there was always homemade bread whenever I
visited. I remember slathering real
butter on a thick slice and savoring every bite.
November 6, 2013
Jane Miller’s Holiday Survival Guide
My two year old daughter found me crying in the middle of
the kitchen floor one day in the middle of December. When my husband came home from work, she
walked up to him and said, “Mommy cwied!”
My husband looked at me and asked, “What’s up?” I replied that I was exhausted from all the
preholiday activities; the shopping, the wrapping, the cleaning, the baking,
etc. He looked me at me and asked, “Now
whose fault is that?”
I resented his response at first. Didn’t he know how difficult it was to do
everything for the holidays? After I
calmed down, I realized, he was right.
It was my own fault. I put too
much pressure on myself to be Super Mom and as a result, was missing what the
holidays were really about.
I had set myself up.
That Christmas, I decided that I was gifting hand sewn puppets and dolls
to all the children in my family. I
managed it, but it put the rest of my holiday preparations behind and I felt
that I would never catch up.
I swore I would never do that to myself again. I decided to start early the next year. I realized that prioritizing and organizing
was the only way I was going to manage without losing my mind and driving my
family crazy. I made a list of things
that I could get out of the way early.
For example, Christmas cards are the easiest to deal with, year after
year. I made a Christmas label
file. I entered the addresses of
everyone on my list. I added a holiday
decoration to make them look less businesslike.
I made return labels, as well.
Now every year, all I have to do is print the labels out and slap them
on the cards. The labels can be changed
every year to reflect additions and deletions.
You may not have time this year, but consider setting it up after the
holidays. It saves an incredible amount
of time.
Once I print my labels, I affix them to the envelopes and
sign the cards. I do this in early
November. All I need to do now is write
my annual Christmas letter and order prints of any photos I needed to
include. I do all of this before
December 1. I mail them that day. They are done and out of the way.
I am one of those people who buy gifts all year round. As I buy them, I wrap them. Wrapping as you go prevents those gosh awful
wrapping marathons. I remember crawling
into bed in the wee hours of one Christmas morning, because I had been up all
night wrapping the kids presents. Never
again!
You can get the majority of your shopping done early,
too. There will be a few gifts you will
to wait to purchase, but try to get the majority of your shopping done before
December 1. Remember the goal is to have
a stress free December.
At my house, decorating is incredibly time consuming. Why?
Because we have a large Christmas tree that has nineteen hundred lights
strung on it and I do all the stringing.
I clean the living room in early November. I try to get the tree up the second weekend
of November so I can take my time stringing the lights and decorating it. We are considering getting a prelit tree,
which again, would save a great deal of time.
Hopefully, we will get one next year.
I wait to put up the rest of the decorations on Thanksgiving
weekend. I don’t turn anything on until
after the first week of December, but again, the decorating is out of the way.
So what do I have left to do? Minimal cleaning, grocery shopping and the
baking! I bake a great deal, but I pace
myself through December. Everything is
done by Christmas Day.
By now, you are thinking, this woman is crazy, I could never
do this. You may be right. The idea is to organize your holiday
preparations in a way that works for you.
The best advice I can give you is “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” None of this is important. One year, you might not get the Christmas
cards out. That is okay! You can do it next year.
My family has specific cookies they expect me to bake every
year. I was a church cantor a few years back
so I had all the holiday choir demands on me as well as the normal holiday
ones. One Christmas I didn’t have time
to bake the cookies. I felt terrible
breaking with the family tradition. I
wound up going to a bakery and buying them.
Guess what? No one complained and
Christmas still happened. I threw up my
hands and did an “Oh, well.” I suggest that
there are times you do so too.
Also, be realistic, if you need to scale down, scale
down. We have got to stop the crazy
demands we place on ourselves. Everyone
is better off when we take a breath and get some perspective. Sewing all those gifts was insane. It wasn’t necessary and all it did was stress
me out. Now I know better.
Are there things that you do to prevent yourself from
getting the holiday crazies? If you do,
please pass on your ideas here. We’re
all in this together.
Have a Happy and Stress Free Holiday!
Jane
October 23, 2013
Cemetery rejects
SpongeBob Monuments
I write when I feel passionate about a cause or an
issue. I’ve been quiet the past few
weeks, because I didn’t want to jump on the shutdown bandwagon. There were plenty of bloggers and pundits
weighing in. The world didn’t need my
two cents
A recent news item stirred me out of my lethargy. A young woman passed away and the cemetery
was upset with her family’s choice of monuments. Now ordinarily this would hardly be
newsworthy, but the young woman was an Army sergeant who had survived two tours
in Iraq. She was murdered at home, allegedly
by her boyfriend. (Please check out CNN’s
report: Cemetery
denies SpongeBob monument
The young woman, Army Sgt.
Kimberly Walker, had a passion. She
loved SpongeBob Squarepants. She
collected SpongeBob items, had SpongeBob birthday parties, etc. The funeral home allowed her family to place
a SpongeBob pillow in her casket. So it
was natural that her family would want that passion a part of her final resting
place.
Her family sought the cemetery’s permission and for $26,000
commissioned two SpongeBob grave markers.
The second grave marker was for her living twin sister.
It hit the fan the day after the stones were delivered. The family was informed that the stones would
be removed. The cemetery issued the
following statement to CNN: "The family chose a design with the guidance of a
Spring Grove employee who unfortunately made an error in judgment. The monument does not fit within Spring Grove
Cemetery guidelines, was not approved by senior management and cannot remain
here."
Like it or not, Spring Grove, the
family spent $26,000, because your employee told them they could. If the employee made an “error” then you
inadequately trained that person. The
least you could do is refund the family’s money for the monuments and assist
them in relocating the young woman’s remains, should they chose to do so. Businesses are often held liable for the
mistakes of their employees. This should
be no exception
Now I understand why the cemetery
acted as it did. The monuments are
garish by industry standards. However, I
disagree that there is no place for them.
A cemetery’s role is to bury the
dead, but it is much more than that. It
should honor and reflect the lives of those buried within. I love old cemeteries. Each grave is unique. My favorite cemetery is Mount Carmel in
Hillside, IL. The cemetery reflects the
history and the people of the era. Al
Capone, along with his lieutenant, Frank Nitti, is buried there and there is a
larger than life size sculpture of a young bride in her gown. I enjoy walking or driving through the place.
I have found that monuments
reflect the person. The old simpler
stones usually said a few words, either stating that the person beneath was a “Beloved
Wife and Mother” or quoted the favorite bible verse of the deceased. My favorite is a carving of a man’s favorite
dog. The animal, nestled at the foot of
a sarcophagus, stands watch over its master in perpetuity. Standing over the grave you get a sense of
the person beneath.
Cemeteries have become homogenized. Most insist that only flat stones that fit
flush with the earth are permissible.
This is done for practical purposes.
It makes the cemetery easier to mow and as a result, costs the cemetery
less to maintain the graves.
This is short sited. Queen of Heaven Cemetery is located across
the street from Mount Carmel. , Besides
the standard grave sites, it consists of a large mausoleum with a number of
satellites. The new mausoleums look like
grave factories. There are sterile and
efficient and I can’t stand them. Life
wills out though. The cemetery, despite
its attempt at standardization, is at the mercy of the mourners. As you drive around the newer sections, you
can’t see the stones, but you can see flowers, teddy bears and balloons
bedecking the graves. I have a young
cousin buried there. Her siblings often
stop by and have a cup of coffee in her honor.
Other groups picnic beside their loved ones. A cemetery isn’t about death. It is about life.
The cemetery industry is stuck in
the Victorian area and it is time for change.
I don’t have a problem with these monuments. If I saw them I would smile and imagine a fun
loving woman who left us way too soon.
I hope for this family’s sake, some solution can be found. They are in my thoughts and prayers.
October
5, 2013
The
Heroin Epidemic
When is enough, enough? How many more children will we lose to
addiction? On July 20, a friend lost her
twenty-one old nephew to a heroin overdose.
Her heart is broken. His family
did everything they could to help him battle his demons, but the drugs were so
accessible.
When I was growing up, heroin addiction was
rare. It was found in the back alleys of
decaying urban areas, not in middle class neighborhoods. The abuse of prescription drugs has risen
since then. When prescription drugs are
unavailable addicts turn to the cheapest alternative they can find. The drugs have increased in potency and decreased
in price, as well. This country has
become a nation of addicts. It is too
darned easy to get high.
So what is to be done? First, we need to destroy the drugs at their
source. Did you know that Afghanistan is
the largest opium producer in the world?
It is a poor country, ravaged by war, and for them, opium production
appears to be a way out. There has to be
alternatives and consequences. The
standard of living in poor countries has to be raised so that the illegal drug
trade can be quashed. By raising the
quality of life in third world countries, you raise it for everyone.
Second, the focus has to be shifted from prosecuting
the small offenders. We need to go after
the big boys, drying up their supplies.
This decreases the influx of drugs and raises the prices. Getting high becomes more difficult.
Third, everyone has to buy in. When
I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE. From
world leaders to moms and dads, everyone has to come on board. As parents, we have to know what are kids are
doing and where they are doing it. If we
suspect drug use, we react. If we see
something, we say something. We have to
petition, bug and drive our elected officials crazy until they commit, as
well. Drug wars can’t be fought in
marketing campaigns. Education isn’t enough. It takes a concerted effort to bring about
change.
So what I am demanding? A real war on drugs! Our past attempts resulted in failure. It will take dedication and a boatload of
money to make this work. We can’t do
this alone. We must get other countries
involved. Addictions cost everyone,
whether it is in increased healthcare costs or loss of productivity. It is also time to demand accountability of
our leaders. This country needs to learn
to cut the pork out of its budget and prioritize where our money goes. If we don’t do this now, we will pay far more
in the long run.
Most will find the above simplistic and idealistic. They would be right. Afghanistan has enough oil and mineral
reserves to do the job, but no one is willing to go there. I doubt we could get Congress to agree to the
necessary funding. They haven’t been
able to agree on anything in years. The
average person feels powerless. We wonder what we can do in the face of such an enormous problem. It is no wonder we throw up our hands in
disgust.
I am frustrated beyond measure. We have fought crisis after crisis. From our economic problems to our dealings
with terrorism, we’ve been stretched pretty thin. I am not ready to throw in the towel. Our country has faced serious issues in the
past, but we have always risen above them.
We have to do something. We are
doomed if we do not.
October 1, 2013
Breaking
Bad
I thought I would let the dust settle before
commenting on the “Breaking Bad” finale.
I had never watched the show, but my daughter and son-in-law were big
fans so I thought I’d watch it to see what the hoopla was about.
Knowing nothing about the show, I still enjoyed
it. It was obviously a show about
redemption. The main character, Walt,
was a former school teacher who turned criminal due to circumstance. He was dying from cancer and needed a way to
provide for his family. The criminal
side took him over. He lost himself and
everything he loved along the way.
Never having watched the show, I enjoyed watching
Walt tidy things up. My daughter felt
differently. She said that she spent
most of series hating him and that she was unhappy that he was portrayed as “sort
of a good guy” at the end. I felt
differently. “Breaking Bad” is a
morality tale. Walt wakes up and tries
to make things right at the end. He
sacrificed his own life to save Jesse’s.
From a Christian point of view, this one selfless act would have
redeemed him. My daughter, again, felt
differently. She felt that there were
some things he did that were not redeemable.
Since I haven’t watched the entire show, I’d like to
know what your think. Feel free to post
your comments here or join my Facebook group at: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1417254195156824/. You will have to ask to join the group I order
to comment. To comment here, you will
need a Google account.
September 18, 2013
When is enough, enough?
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing. ~ Macbeth
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing. ~ Macbeth
Another shooting, shouldn't that bother us? Shouldn't we be appalled by it? We are, but compared to Columbine, our reaction is not the same. Mass murders have become common place. The distance between them is becoming shorter and nothing is done about it.
The gun control advocates emerge as soon as the incidents occur. Politicians flap their jaws, commiserating with the victim's families, saying that it has to stop. The NRA responds, pummeling us with every progun piece of propaganda from their well funded arsenal and it's over. Nothing happens. Everyone goes back to their caves until it happens again.
The NRA will point out that these shootings constitute about 1% of gun violence in the U.S. and I agree that it is a small number. They will also point out the gun control that is being advocated will have little to no impact on such crimes. Again, I agree, but we have to tighten things up so it is, at the very least, more difficult for criminals and the mentally ill to purchase weapons. None of the gun control legislation that has been proposed in the past few years would prevent legal, responsible gun owners from owning guns. I don't understand what the problem is.
As soon as some one advocates gun control, the NRA starts screaming. Too bad! The NRA claims that is for responsible gun ownership. If that is true, they shouldn't have a problem with purchasing their guns legally and keeping them under lock and key when not in use.
Gun control can not be left up to the individual states. It just doesn't work. New Jersey and Chicago have some of the toughest laws in the country, but the laws are ineffective when the surrounding states have much looser laws. It's too easy too cross state lines.
Finally, we have to seriously address mental health issues in this country.
So what is it going to take for someone to do something about the gun related violence in this country? Theater patrons slaughtered in their seats wasn't enough. Innocent children were massacred and it wasn't enough. When will we finally say, "Enough is enough?"
September 16, 2013
On a lighter note....
I wonder how Vladamir Putin expects us to take him seriously when he takes his shirt off more often than Jake from the Twilight movies. Please President Putin, put your shirt back on. You are not sexy! I repeat you are not sexy!
September 15, 2013
The voters of New York have spoken.
It is not surprising that Anthony Weiner lost his bid for the mayor of NYC this week. Voters were over him and yet, he hung in there, optimistic to the end. In an interview with NBC's Savannah Guthrie, he stated, “From the moment go, I was waging this campaign on a bet. The bet was basically that I know that people have embarrassing
things they would hear about me and did know about me and my
background, but I also knew that I had the best ideas and I’d be the
best mayor for the city.”
Guthrie's response was classic, "Are you really saying that with a straight face?"
MSNBC's, Lawrence O'Donnell interviewed Weiner just hours before the polls opened. It was an interview that will go down in history. Weiner was agitated and argumentative. At one point he erupted into a maniacal laugh. You can watch the interview at: http://politicker.com/2013/09/chillax-buddy-anthony-weiner-does-epic-msnbc-interview-hours-before-polls-open/
Weiner came across as mentally unstable. He knew the ship was sinking and he acted like a crazed rat, desperately treading water. On his way home from his concession speech, he gave an NBC reporter the middle finger. He remained a class act to the end.
Elliot Spitzer ran a different election that Weiner. He addressed the issues he had in the past at the beginning of the campaign and then ignored them for the rest of the campaign. Although his race was a lot closer than Weiner's, he still lost.
Both men felt that they could put their pasts behind them and run on issues. Fortunately, voters were sick of the sleeze and the lies. This is a good sign. People are no longer saying that "sex" isn't a big deal and that it has nothing to do with a person's ability to do their job. Weiner's and Spitzer's peccadillos caught up with them. People are demanding that their leaders be respectable. That isn't a lot to ask.
September 14, 2013
The U.S. and Russia Reach Agreement on Syria
The following link provides the full story in detail. http://worldnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/09/14/20490098-us-russia-reach-deal-on-syrias-chemical-weapons?lite
It isn't the perfect solution, but it is a diplomatic one. It wouldn't have occurred if the U.S. hadn't threatened Syria in the first place. Please read the entire article. The U.S. really didn't want to get in the middle of that hot mess. It was concerned that Syria would continue to use sarin gas on innocents. Assad and his government should still be tried for war crimes. A friend pointed out that still can happen, that it took awhile before the Nazis were tried for their criminal acts.
If anything, the response to Assad's actions has put the world on notice. Let's hope and pray that I am right.
September 13, 2013
One thing that really bugged me about Putin's letter was the hypocrisy of it. Putin is providing weapons and support to Syria, so he has a dog in the fight. It is hypocritical to say that our involvement in Syria is not in our best interests when it is in his that we not become involved.
September 12, 2013
Putin’s Op-Ed
Sen. Robert Menendez, D-NJ, stated that he almost wanted to
vomit after reading Vladimir Putin’s op-ed in Thursday’s New York Times. I had the opposite reaction. I burst out laughing. Only Vladimir Putin, a man who came up
through the ranks of the KGB, would have the hubris to lecture us about what is
in our national interest.
It makes me question how serious Putin is in his proposal to turn
Syria’s chemical weapons to the UN.
Russia and Syria have had a friendly relationship for years. Russia’s only naval base in the Mediterranean
is located in a Syrian port. Russia also
carries a lot of weight in the UN. So I
am sorry if I am suspicious that this letter is just another game play on Putin’s
part
Putin stated, “No
one doubts that poison gas was used in Syria. But there is every reason to
believe it was used not by the Syrian Army, but by opposition forces, to
provoke intervention by their powerful foreign patrons, who would be siding
with the fundamentalists.” Baloney!
“We have physical
evidence of where the rockets came from and when. Not one rocket landed in regime-controlled
territory. Not one. All of them landed in opposition-controlled
or contested territory. We have a map,
physical evidence, showing every geographical point of impact and that is
concrete.” ~ John Kerry
Sorry
Putin, your buddy murdered noncombatants.
They were innocent people. He is
a war criminal and you are covering for him.
He also says, “In
the United States, many draw an analogy between Iraq and Syria, and ask why
their government would want to repeat recent mistakes.” I agree with him that Iraq was a
mistake. However, he is hardly one to
lecture us on mistakes. His country has
made plenty. To hobble Syria with Iraq
is disingenuous. Syria is not Iraq.
He
goes on to say: “No
matter how targeted the strikes or how sophisticated the weapons, civilian
casualties are inevitable, including the elderly and children, whom the strikes
are meant to protect.” He lost me
here. So what is he saying? If the Syrian Army didn’t use the gas, then
why is he defending its use? He does a
shoulder shrug. This is where I gagged.
It gets worse. He goes on to say: “The world reacts by
asking: if you cannot count on international law, then you must find other ways
to ensure your security. Thus a growing number of countries seek to acquire weapons
of mass destruction. This is logical: if you have the bomb, no one will touch
you. We are left with talk of the need to strengthen nonproliferation, when in
reality this is being eroded.”
He’s right. If the UN does not enforce international law,
then it’s no man’s land. It is everyone
for themselves. However, his logic is
flawed. Chemical weapons are against
international law. By allowing his
Syrian friends to get away with mass murder, he is responsible for the disintegration
of international law.
He ends his diatribe with the
following paragraph: “My working and
personal relationship with President Obama is marked by growing trust. I
appreciate this. I carefully studied his address to the nation on Tuesday. And I
would rather disagree with a case he made on American exceptionalism, stating
that the United States’ policy is “what makes America different. It’s what
makes us exceptional.” It is extremely dangerous to encourage people to see
themselves as exceptional, whatever the motivation. There are big countries and
small countries, rich and poor, those with long democratic traditions and those
still finding their way to democracy. Their policies differ, too. We are all
different, but when we ask for the Lord’s blessings, we must not forget that
God created us equal.”
First of all, I have a hard
time believing that Putin believes in God.
It is hard to reconcile his KGB past with that. Secondly, I am sorry, but telling us that we
are not unique, that there is nothing special about us, is hardly going to
endear us to you or make us willing to see your side of the argument. The definition of American exceptionalism
simply means that we feel that we have the ability to change the world (and
hopefully, make it a better one.) What
is funny that Russia used to see itself in the same way, but it doesn’t have
the ability to play with the big boys any more.
Boiled down, Putin is pouting, so he had to take a shot at us.
I am not saying his letter
didn’t have some valid points. He
states, “Syria is not witnessing a battle for democracy, but an armed conflict
between government and opposition in a multireligious country. There are few
champions of democracy in Syria.
But there are more than enough Qaeda fighters and extremists of all stripes
battling the government.” There is ample
evidence that Al-Qaeda is backing the rebels.
Of course, Al-Qaeda has an agenda of its own. In backing and fighting with the rebels, it
hopes to take control of the country. It
was never the U.S. government’s plan to side with the rebels, but to enforce
the international law against the use of chemical weapons. It is an incredible and extremely complicated
balancing act. Putin acts like the
United States hasn’t a clue here. It’s
pretty insulting.
Max Fisher of the Washington
Post did an excellent job of fact checking Putin’s letter, paragraph by
paragraph. If you have the opportunity,
please read it: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/09/12/vladimir-putins-new-york-times-op-ed-annotated-and-fact-checked/
Max states in the opening
paragraph of his article: “Putin does make a number of valid and even
compelling points, but there is an undeniable hypocrisy and even some moments
of dishonesty between the lines.” I
couldn’t agree with him more.
September 11, 2013
9/11
This morning, MSNBC replayed the minute-to-minute coverage
of the morning of September 11, 2001.
Watching it, I felt like someone had punched me in the gut. I was amazed at my reaction. It has been twelve years, but watching that
coverage brought it all back. I felt a
little like Alice in Wonderland. I fell
down the rabbit hole.
The Syrian crisis might have something to do with my
reaction. We can’t go back to the world before
9/11. The world is frightening, out of
control, and we are all twitchy, as a result.
I worked at AT&T’s campus in Middletown, New Jersey at
the time. I loved viewing the Twin Towers
from the fifth floor’s office window. In
the midafternoon, I would pour myself a cup of coffee and stare at them. The sun hit their southern exposures and the
towers would shimmer with golden light.
It was breath taking. I went back
to those same windows once afterwards. I
couldn’t do it again. There was a gap in
the cityscape that could never be replaced.
It was too painful to stand there.
We are now embroiled in another crisis. We’ve made some mistakes since that fateful
day. However, that shouldn’t color the
Syrian issue. Syria isn’t Iraq. It isn’t Afghanistan.
There is no doubt now that Syria has chemical weapons. They’ve admitted it. The Russians acknowledged it when they asked
Syria if they would be willing to turn their weapons over to the UN. Of course, this is a gambit on their part. The weapons are cached all over the
country. Syria will never reveal all of
their locations. The country is at war
so it will be impossible to get to them without risking the lives of UN
personnel.
The president is still making a case for a military strike,
but has left a window open for diplomatic intervention. He knows that Americans are burnt out by
war. He knows he has limited support in
Congress and the rest of the world. He
knows the UN will not support him. He
has asked Congress to delay a vote until the diplomatic attempts have been
abandoned, but still leaves open the possibility of a military response.
To me, it appears that he feels that Assad must be sent a
message. Personally, if we agree to Putin’s recommendation, if we take a
military strike off the table, then Assad and his government have gotten away
with mass murder.
We have to ask ourselves, “Can we live with that?” I keep mentally going back to that fifth
floor window. Osama bin laden is
dead. The victims of 9/11 have been
avenged. It makes our memories and
losses of that day no less painful, but we feel that a certain amount of
justice has been done. I keep thinking
of innocent Syrians, their bodies lined up side-by-side and wonder if they will
ever have a measure of comfort.
September 10, 2013
This speaks volumes: Russia will urge Syria to put chemical weapons under int'l control, Russian FM says. http://on.cnn.com/1cY3Mj2
Is it possible to have a diplomatic solution to the crisis? Ideally, yes, but putting this solution into action is extremely difficult. The weapons are hidden all over the country and trying to get UN inspectors safely into a war zone is damned near impossible.
I would still like to see Assad and his government punished. I doubt it will happen at this point.
September 8, 2013
Syria
Should we or shouldn’t
we?
I post on news sites regularly. I am always more than willing to give my
opinion on any number of subjects. I
thrive on the mental stimulation. I
enjoy the give and take with others and I have learned so much. My posts have been used on several television
news programs, radio programs and a number have been published in my local
newspaper. I must admit that I was
surprised when the Asbury Park Press contacted me through their Facebook page. One of their staff writers wanted to discuss
my feelings about the current crisis in Syria, based on what I had posted on
the page.
My post was as follows: "I am torn about this. I, like
so many, am sick of war. Yet, what is going on in Syria has to be addressed.
Gassing noncombatants is no different than what went on in Nazi Germany. A
moral person can't turn a blind eye to genocide. I think a limited engagement
to send a message is a good idea. I am glad that Saudi Arabia is calling the UN
to action." (Of course, Saudi Arabia isn’t without a dog in this fight.)
The gentleman called me on Thursday. We had a long, interesting discussion. I asked him what kind of response he had
received. He said that he was talking to
twenty people. The majority he had
spoken with didn’t want us to go into Syria at all. One person was strongly for an attack and
then there was me who was torn by the issue.
I have played the devil’s advocate most of my life. I tend to see both sides of an issue before I
come out strongly one way or another.
The crisis in Syria is such a mess that I don’t know where to begin.
I understand why so many are burned out on war. We were wrong to go into Iraq. We went in based on faulty intelligence. I’ve always felt that President Bush had
personal reasons for wanting to go after Saddam Hussein. Saddam had taken a swipe at George H. Bush
and President Bush was ticked that he had gone after his daddy! So yes, we were wrong to go in there. Many people felt we were lied to by our
government. I will say that getting good
intelligence is darned near impossible in the Middle East (especially during that
time period.) These are small countries where
everyone is related to everyone else. It
is impossible to put an operative in who would be accepted by the locals. The war cost American lives and a heck of a
lot of money. It destroyed our
credibility with the rest of the world, something that we have just been
getting back. However, while I agree
that we should have never gone in, I don’t regret the deaths of Saddam Hussein
and his sons. This world is a better
place without their presence.
Afghanistan didn’t help.
It is an incredible difficult country to do battle in. The Russians were entrenched there for
years. The two wars combined burned
Americans out. We are tired of seeing
young men dying. We are tired of being seen
as the bad guys. We are tired of pouring
money into other countries when we need it so badly here.
So naturally, when Syria crossed the red line, we were ready
to throw in the towel. The Middle East
has always been volatile. It will always
be volatile. Why should we stick our
nose in their business again? People are
afraid of getting involved, of backing the wrong side, of being lied to again
and even if we did agree to do it, how can we afford to do to get involved?
The fact that this is being debated before any action is taken
is making things worse. Assad has surely
moved anything valuable away from our potential targets. Other governments are flip-flopping as to
whether they wish to become involved or not.
The UN is incredibly corrupt.
What their response will be is any one’s guess.
I don’t envy Obama.
This is a hard case of “damned if you do; damned if you don’t.” Like it or not, Syria seriously violated
international law. Even U. N.
Secretary-General Ki-moon stated that if the use of sarin gas on noncombatants
is confirmed that it is an “outrageous war crime.” Do I believe Assad did it? YES!
Unequivocally, YES!
Why? I trust John
Kerry. The man is not a hawk. He is not a war monger. He stated that the U.S. “intelligence
community has scrubbed and rescrubbed the evidence.” He also stated that “We have physical
evidence of where the rockets came from and when. Not one rocket landed in regime-controlled
territory. Not one. All of them landed in opposition-controlled
or contested territory. We have a map, physical
evidence, showing every geographical point of impact and that is concrete.”
No politician is going to try to pull the wool over our eyes
after what happened in Iraq. In today’s
information age, it is too easy to find out the truth. They know that the American public and the
world are going to demand absolute proof.
Putin’s reaction is another reason.
Putin has stated that he will stand by Syria. That isn’t surprising. What is surprising is that he also said that Russia
"doesn't exclude" the possibility of supporting a UN resolution authorizing
military strikes.” Now folks, that is
major. Yes, he is covering his backside,
but he is an arrogant SOB. He has never
felt that he had to defend his decisions to anyone. He has also stated that he would require “convincing
evidence that President Assad’s government used chemical weapons against
citizens” and that the “currently available evidence does not fulfill this
criteria.” It boils down to him watching how it plays out. Now if the evidence was bogus, he wouldn’t
feel the need to cover both sides of the action. He is covering his bets. It speaks volumes.
It is going to be interesting to see how this plays out in
the U. N. The U.N. is corrupt.
An excellent article on U. N. corruption can be found here: http://www.defenddemocracy.org/united-nations-corruption-and-the-need-for-reform/
The U.N. takes our money, but doesn’t like us. It consists of a bunch of despots who are out
for themselves. It is hardly the ideal
organization to go to in a situation like this.
If the U. N. does decide to take action, it won’t be because it is the
right thing to do. They will do it because
it is in their best interests.
A Facebook poster asked what is the big deal? How is killing people with gas any different
than killing them with any other weapon?
First of all, the people who died were noncombatants. This is the same as the gas chambers of Nazi
Germany. Second, the international norm
is that this is a heinous act. The
following article discusses both sides of this argument: http://www.cnn.com/2013/08/27/world/meast/syria-chemical-weapons-red-line/index.html
I feel that it makes war too neat and tidy. When gas is used, there is little property
damage. There are no broken bodies, no
torn limbs. The dead look like they are
sleeping. They are easily carted
away. The area is left intact with
little to no evidence that anything evil had occurred. . War
should be horrendous. It should be
nasty. It should never be easy.
Others ask, “Why should we be the world’s police force?” As I said before, you can’t count on the U.
N. Who else should serve as a counter
balance to countries like North Korea and Iran?
Who else should be the world’s moral compass? In the past, when we’ve tried to withdraw in
to ourselves, others have taken advantage of it. See: http://www.cnn.com/2012/09/18/opinion/gottlieb-us-retrenchment. The world goes to hell in a hand basket
without us. Have we made mistakes,
sure? No police force is perfect, but we
do our best.
I am tired of war. I
am tired of hate. I am tired of young
people dying and I am tired of seeing photographs of suffering and dead
children. Yet, I can’t stand the idea
that this bastard is going to get away with this. When we discovered the real horrors of WWII,
we said, “Never again.”
So what is the solution?
I don’t know at this point there is one, but I’ll take a stab at it. We waited too late to make a quick
strike. Assad had time to move critical
military targets. So now we have to be
patient and see what the U.N. says. I
would prefer seeing the U. N. man up and
come out against Assad, declaring him a war criminal. There is no need to “side” with the
rebels. Just punish Assad and his
government for their war crimes. If the
U. N. doesn’t come out against him, then unfortunately, it is up to us to let
him know in no uncertain terms, that if he does it again, we will act. This doesn’t mean we have to send in land
troops. That isn’t necessary with our
capabilities. Some say we should do nothing. I wish I could agree with them. Unfortunately, North Korea and others are
taking notes. There are huge stockpiles
of biochemical weapons out there that the bad guys are more than willing to use
if there are no repercussions for their actions.
I pray for us all. I
especially pray for the children of the world.
They deserve a life free of fear.
We adults have to say, “Enough!”
August 14, 2013
Do you have to be crazy to get on Big Brother?
No, but it helps!
If you have been watching the live feeds this week, you may
have noticed Helen and Aaryn commenting on the mental stability of HG’s. Helen said something to the affect that BB
casts unstable people. She was concerned
about their behavior once they leave the house.
BB has had more than its share of crazies and yes, I believe
they cast them on purpose. I’ve compared
HGs to middle schoolers in the past and I stand by that. It is that middle school drama that keeps
viewers riveted.
This season seems to have more than its share, but it isn’t
unique. Justin Sebik held a knife to
female HG’s throat in BB2. In 2008, Evel
Dick verbally abused women in the house.
Adam of BB 2009, called autistics “retards.” Racial and homophobic comments abounded in
BB13. Willie Hantz was kicked off BB 14
after fighting with a HG. CBS happily
airs it all, content that it will generate controversy and ratings.
Is BB casting people that are unstable? The Hantz family has a reputation for hot
tempers, emotional instability and aggression.
Why would anyone hire them? For
ratings, of course! Russell and Brandon
Hantz made headlines with their insane behavior on Survivor (another CBS
show.) So why not bring in Willie to
stir things up in the BB house?
I get it. I really
do. When things calm down in the BB, it
gets boring. HGs were told this week to
ramp up the drama. Jessie’s meltdown
wasn’t surprising. People claim that BB
is scripted. I don’t believe HGs are
reading from a script, but they are directed.
This isn’t a reality show. The
fact that three of the HG’s this season have acting experience illustrates
this. Actors take direction better than
your average person so it makes sense to throw a few into the mix.
What concerns me is the potential for this to get out of
hand. People aren’t toys. You can’t play with them and then throw them
away when they break. One of these days,
a HG is going to lose it and someone is going to get hurt. CBS will waive their disclaimers and claim
that it wasn’t their fault. Good lord,
what has programming become?
August 8, 2013
Washington Cafe Owner Publicly Shames Young Mother
A Washington cafe owner called out a young mother and her two small children on Facebook for leaving a mess when they left the restaurant. According to the mother, the children were well behaved and they were cleaning up after themselves when the owner came over, berated them, told them to leave and banned them from the restaurant.
I saw the video. We are talking a few crumbs here. The kids were eating a scone which falls apart easily. I have taken my granddaughter to restaurants since she was old enough to sit in a high chair. My daughter and I do our best to clean up after her, but occasionally, we will enlist the help of the restaurant. No one has ever seemed to mind. When a restaurant is family oriented, a little mess is expected. A quick sweep of the broom usually does the job. We always tip a bit more for their inconvenience.
This public shaming has got to stop. The owner's calling them out was inappropriate. To loudly berate them in front of everyone is humiliating. She has offered a half apology for the Facebook posting, but did not apologize for her behavior in the cafe. The mother has stated that she will never go back there. Neither would I, her behavior is inexcusable.
The owner has the right to refuse service, but she also is responsible for her actions. Her behavior was over the top. Why would anyone want to eat there? This will affect her bottom line, but unfortunately, she sees herself as a victim, not as the root of the problem.
This incident highlights a more serious issue, public shaming. Social media has allowed the passive aggressive to run amok. Anyone can take a photo and publicly humiliate a person. It is bullying and it has to stop.
August 5,. 2013
Alex Rodriguez
Drug use in sports has been a prevailing problem. People are blaming the players and I agree that it does fall on them. However, the owners are just as at culpable. Like Paula Deen, like Big Brother and CBS, it is all about money. Sports teams generate an incredible amount of revenue. Owners shell out obscene amounts of money for players and expect those players to earn it. Players feel pressured. When numerous players are taking drugs to enhance their performance, those that don't are at a disadvantage. Some feel that they have no choice when "everyone is doing it." Is it right, of course not, but you are talking about careers and livelihoods. You can understand how easy it becomes to rationalize it.
I would feel optimistic if MLB truly enforced drug testing. If they came down on every player that took performance enhancing drugs, the problem would soon dissipate. The owners would then would be forced to face reality. They need to stop looking at them as cash registers and see them as human beings.
We are at fault too. We treat our players like gods. They are men and have the faults of all men. When one of them falls, we have to stop acting surprised.
August 4, 2013
One of things that bothers me about the current "sexual escapades" controversies is the dumbing down of morality in America. Criticizing someone for bad behavior is politically incorrect. Now don't get me wrong, I am glad that people are no longer being ostracized for making mistakes.
Elliot Spitzer was caught cheating on his wife with an expensive hooker and paid a price politically, yet he's been forgiven. Americans are a generous people and are more than willing to give someone a second chance. Spitzer is now in the midst of a divorce. It appears that he has learned from his mistake. He is suitably apologetic and acknowledges that it can't happen again. (Let's hope!)
Years ago, this wouldn't be the case. That is why FDR and JFK hid their peccadillos from the public. Weiner is hoping that today's voters no longer care about morality. He also hopes that as he continues to tap dance around his lying to them three times, they will eventually forget. He hopes voters will feel bad for criticizing him. I don't think we are there yet. However, criticizing someone for bad behavior is beginning to become uncool. In fact, in some cases, bad behavior is being rewarded.
A case in point, is this year's Big Brother cast. I say cast, because you can't call them contestants. They are especially chosen for the drama they will bring to the game and they are paid salaries. This year's cast is racist, homophobic and misogynistic, yet, they are all still on the show. In fact, Aaryn, a woman who has said abominable things I haven't heard in years, was praised by production for tossing an African-America woman's bed. Bad behavior pays.
I said in a previous blog that Paula Deen was ostracized for saying the "n" word and CBS is making money off of it. Although I feel the reaction to Paula was way over the top, I believe CBS's behavior is far worse. Should she had been criticized for her behavior, yes! Should she be destroyed, no! She should be called out on her offenses (and if she did break any laws, face the legal repercussions), but destroying her solves nothing. It put a lot of people out of work and she learns nothing by it. She became a victim. On the other hand, by rewarding and encouraging bad behavior, CBS is making it socially acceptable.
I think the problem is that no one knows where the line anymore. Weiner is counting on it. CBS is banking on it.
July 31, 2013
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgAjzlwClBw&feature=youtu.be (Kristen Chenoweth's Anthony Weiner Parody)
Everyone is sick of Anthony Weiner and wants him to go away. He is digging in his heels. He is such an egotist that he can't picture not winning. In his new campaign ad, he compares himself to the city of New York, saying that quitting isn't what New Yorkers do, that they fight through tough things. Yes, New Yorkers are tough, but you're a pervert who is trying to deflect from the issue.
David Axelrod stated it well when he said, "Americans believe in second chances, but not third chances," It is the case of "fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice shame on me." Anthony is counting on voter's short attention spans. It isn't going to happen this time. Quit now. I'd say with dignity, but that option was gone a long time ago.
July 28, 2013
Anthony Weiner etal.
We have been continuously subjected to politicians who can't keep it in their pants. Many feel that a politician's sex life is his business. In other countries, politicians who stray aren't a big deal. There is an old story of a Russian spy who approached a French politician. He had several compromising photos of the politician and his mistress. To the chagrin of the spy, the Frenchman looked the photos over and said, "I'll take this one, this one and this one." A mistress isn't seen as a big deal in France so the spy had no power over the politician.
I feel a person's sex life should be private, but there are exceptions. Having a mistress is a big deal in the U. S. Since it is a big deal, there are repercussions when a politician is caught with his pants down. It opens him up to blackmail for one and he appears dishonest and unreliable.
Having sex outside of marriage is more complicated when it comes to a high ranking government official such as the president. I had no problem with Bill Clinton cheating on Hillary. I had problems with the ramifications of his actions. First, it is a much bigger deal. It doesn't just open him up to blackmail, but to espionage. Second, Monica Lewinsky was an intern and as such, he was her superior. Fooling around with an employee is a big no-no in the corporate world as it opens the superior to sexual harassment suits. Even if the woman is willing, he still has power over her. Men, like Bill Clinton, are all about power. Third, Monica and her kind are not protected by Secret Service. I am under the impression that the FBI keeps an eye on presidential girlfriends, but do we really want our tax dollars being used for this? Finally, it is disruptive. It is difficult to hide anything in Washington and the truth eventually comes out. Think of all the tax dollars that were spent on the scandal.
Should we be more like the French? I think we have become less concerned with politicians having affairs, but we still have problems with them lying about it. Anthony Weiner has made lying an art form. He was still texting and acting like a perv after he apologized and left office. He was still doing it when he and his wife posed for People magazine. People have a right to be concerned that he can't or doesn't want to quit. The man is sick. He needs help. As much as I have sympathy for his poor wife, I don't want him in office.
He stated that this campaign isn't about him, but about the citizens of NYC. He is so wrong. There is no way he could do the mayor's job with this always in the background. No one would ever take him seriously.
There are limits to the public's patience. He lost his campaign manager today. I don't blame him. Anthony, step down, it's over.
July 26, 2013
Imagine my surprise when my blog’s dashboard indicated that I
have more readers outside the U.S. than within. Thank you for your support!
You’ve seen me rail against so many things. For many, the only knowledge they have of
Americans is what they read or see on television. That frightens me. We are so much more than that and perhaps so
much less.
I’ve talked about how we shouldn’t regard what we see on
television as reality. Television
programs are manufactured. Their primary
goal is high ratings so that they can charge more for advertising, making a
profit for their owners and/or stockholders.
This means that they will only present that which peaks viewer
interest. On one hand, that is a good
thing. I want to be able to watch
programming that interests me. On the other,
it isn’t so good. All of us enjoy a bit
of gossip. We are fascinated with
disasters. The latest scandal gives us
something to discuss.
So a lot of programming is aimed at the prurient side of
us. It doesn’t show the real us. Americans are no different than anyone else
in the world. We are born. We go to school. We marry. We have children. We grow old.
We die. We aren’t our governments
and we aren’t our television programming.
America is a melting pot.
My father’s family emigrated from Sicily. My mother was Southern. Her family came to this country in the 1600’s. My Dad is Catholic. My mother was Southern Baptist. There are families like mine all over the
country. I doubt there is a nationality
or ethnicity that isn’t represented here.
Despite a wide swath of cultural differences, we have a lot in
common. We want to live healthy, happy, productive
lives and want what is best for our families.
The saddest thing in this world is that we never get to
really know someone else. The noise gets
in the way. I would love to get to know
you. The purpose of this blog is to
discuss today’s news. Please feel free
to comment here. If you feel more
comfortable writing in your own language, go for it! I have a translation application that works
fairly well. I can translate your
posting for all to see.
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* Remember this is a safe place to discuss today's topics. That I reserve the right to delete posts that are inappropriate.
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* Remember this is a safe place to discuss today's topics. That I reserve the right to delete posts that are inappropriate.
